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Finding Neverland..

Posted by Unknown | Posted in , | Posted on Wednesday, December 08, 2010



"Yar bc is mulq main nahi rehna". I hear these words as i observe the police officer at the front desk. I am trying to figure out whats the guy upto. Whats he scribbling on that sheet of paper. Probably, just recording our so called "felony" in our files.
As it turned out a couple of minutes later, the officer had other intentions. The five of us were led into the lockup and held for a couple of hours. We tried to laugh away the time to make ourselves feel secure, just like little children.



Now i remember that night in particular, not because i was 400miles away from home locked up in a cell but because one of us had arrived the kingdom that very morning and he hadnt met his dad yet. So inevitably he was going to meet him here, like this. It was such a shame especially because we were being held for no reason at all. But what was to be done. Who were we to take any action. Bloody foreigners, our voices like squeaks in a large hall, easily supressed by a single bark. We were frustrated, but at the same, we knew whatever we resolve in emotion will be forgotten, in a few weeks it will be an incident of the past and we will again be blindfolded by the luxuries saudi arabia has to offer. Something, people from our homeland can only dream about. We'll eventually forget what low levels our self-respect has attained. We'll continue with our lives..


And it happened exactly in the same way. We were bailed out after a few hours, the story was told, the blame was placed, the authorities we cursed and the next day was a normal day. By then, probably only the silent waves of sea rock remembered the tale..


As far as i can remember, of all the time i lived in saudi arabia, since the very beginning i had this feeling of 'not belonging', which at a later stage, as i started stepping out of the house, turned to 'not welcome'.. Even further, down the road as i took up a job and interacted somewhat indirectly with the government and other authorities the feeling transformed into 'fuck off foreigner'. To put it simply, we all know saudis hate us and viceversa. But, what exactly are we doing in a country that is under the rule of tyranny? In a country, where our status, our pride, our self-respect is nothing but a joke? Where we are treated like slaves, literally as interpreted from our employment contracts. The answer is a very basic one: survival; something that has been the priority of cave-men. We want the luxury of, if not good, clean food, a healthy environment, good education and a stable life, where death doesnt lurk around every corner. We want a future. Where we can think of tommorrow and be certain to some extent, atleast. We want all the basic necessities that our homeland deprives us of..


As a student, as a youngster, life in saudi arabia can be brutal. If i didn't end up in the eastern province in a company of friends, that i'll be eternally grateful for, i could have easily been a high school drop-out working poor jobs in Riyadh. An average Pakistani youngster in Riyadh sniffs glue, has multiple whores that he feeds and fucks and visits his house just to use the bed. Many work poorly paid jobs because their fathers have given up on the hopes of them becoming something and consider this as damage control. And it is by observation that i speak. If a guy doesnt get out of that self-destructing environment soon, he adapts to it, as i noticed only those who were sent abroad for further education maintained some hope for their future. The rest are neglected scums, outlaws in the making.. And this is the story of each and every Pakistani in Riyadh. Only if u grew up in Riyadh, u would know how it is to be wrong and yet feel right. For the Pakis in Al-Sharqia, the ones who attended better schools turned out much more sensible. But these are just the internal factors, they dont rule out the external factors affecting you, no matter where in Saudi Arabia you live. Being a Pakistani or specifically a foreigner, in general has its drawbacks. You'll have no say in important matters. Fuck important, you will have no say in your own matters. No rights, no social value. In-fact the best way to live in Saudi Arabia is to go unnoticed. Its very easy, leave your house only for work/college, drive slow-but not slow enough to get noticed, carry the green book- the Iqama- the proof of being an accepted slave at all times, don't participate in anything and avoid social contact.. Assume the occurrence of a zombie invasion in the outer world. Even then it cant be guaranteed that you won't be harassed at a random checkpoint.


As for our homeland, do you really wanna hear about it? 
Theres just this great feeling of belonging and freedom, shadowed by corruption and what not. There are so many issues worth notice that i'll sum it all up by saying, we are in deep shit. The problems faced as a student are corrupt academic systems, unreliable local transportation, availability of drugs and so many fellow fucked up students going down the hole, trying to take you down with them.
The whole idea of being a student is fucked up. Students feel obliged to do drugs and have sex to feel mature and important. Sex is everywhere, in every city, every town, every alley. Brainwashed girls and boys, the whole youth under the influence of misleading television. 


As for the religious aspects, its no problem at all. Everyone has his own version of Islam that he has manipulated to fit his needs. For many 'maulvis' its a very profitable business. Everybody's just going with the flow, there no time to stop and rethink your life. We are in deep waters and we are headed deeper.


I love my country, i try to love my country, but the people, the government, the system, just won't let me. I like the idea of being a die-hard patriot. But this country doesn't deserve patriotism. You devote, follow the code to the ladder only to get kicked back to the ground. 


Fuck the public, fuck the government and fuck the system. The land however is worth fighting for, the history of the country is worth sacrificing for, the word Pakistan and what it stands for, is worth dying for.. 


  If only, if only.. our country was stable, had a global reputation, and people looked up to us.. 
But then we wouldn't have been in a foreign country in the first place.. So we hope, that one day our government will deliver, one day Pakistan will be a developed country, the facts state otherwise, yet theres this slight hope of finding neverland...




A random group of people was questioned in the matter by Adnan Nayyer. The details of the accounts follow;


The first person whose time Adnan managed to seize was Raza Waqar. He was travelling to Rome that evening. Adnan had the honor of joining him 9000ft above the ground, in his private jet, Adnan asked him about the different features of leading a life in Pakistan and in KSA.


Raza nodded, took a sip from the glass of champagne he had squeezed in his right hand and spoke: "The experiences that I've had in these past years have taught me a lot about the way of lives in the two countries.. As for Saudi Arabia the best things attached to it are childhood, memories and friends, fucking friends who, given the right amount of motivation, are ready to do anything. Especially @ Sea-rock. Now thats a place where we would agree upon fucking ourselves, however i am grateful, no one ever came up with the idea..."
Raza took another sip, took a deep sigh and spoke again: "But spending your young life in Saudi Arabia has its cons, there were never much places to hangout, the whole outing was 'Jehadi, home and back to Jehadi'.. Such wasteful years of our energy-packed young lives.."


Adnan: "How do you feel about Pakistan?"


Raza: "Hmm..Now thats a country that re-defines freedom, if i was a billionaire i'd live in Pakistan.. No better place to spend off your money.."


Adnan: "What exactly do have in mind?"


Raza: "Deedar.. i'd hire her for the weekends, of-course for the purpose of 'mujra' only.. and make her dance, dance and dance...."
Raza stares at his glass for a moment...clears his throat and speaks: "But Pakistan too comes with the whole package, the corruption, the unfair legal system and all that bullshit we are sick and tired of..."
"If only i had Deedar.. that fucking bitch.." 

Adnan: "But don't you already have a girlfriend?"


Raza gulps down the left-over champagne and throws Adnan off the jet..




Another personality with whom Adnan managed to have small-talk with, was $aigol,
Adnan accompanied him in his hummer limo, he was on the way to Mini-golf, had a foosball match against Christiano Ronaldo..
As Adnan sat opposite to $aigol, he recognized Anne Hathaway, sitting to $aigol's left and Katrina Kaif to his right..
Fucking $$$'s..


$aigol's opinions were: "Saudi police is fucked up. Period. These fucking authorities. They don't know me, they don't know who they are dealing with. Fuck 'em... And No clubs, No malls, No hurma.. The place is a fucking jungle. The government doesn't know how to channel the Shabab's energy. Its being 'drifted' off"
.."On the contrary these people know Islam, i'll give u that. Perhaps, the only good thing about 'em"
Katrina draws the cigar in her hand towards $aigol's mouth and he puffs on the Cuban in her hand,
"If you ask me about Pakistan, its a place to be.. Freedom, comfort.. the whole package....
However, unfettered power in the hands of every other citizen can't be right, right? People making their own laws, bending rules.. The whole country is taking the hit for their actions.."
$aigol says: "Hello!" waving his hand in front of Adnan, who is staring at Katrina..




Adnan: "I love you Khhhatrina"
$aigol reaches in his coat pocket and advances with his gold-plated 9mm, Adnan jumps off the limo..


Another friend, Zohair, was generous enough to spare some time and comment on the topic,
Zohair: "The worst thing about Saudi Arabia would be Blocked URLs, unfair laws, Saudi police, the arrogant and non educated Saudi public...but theres the luxury of good food, friends and Holy sites etc..."
Zohair goes into the bathroom and returns after 45mins.
Zohair: "Foooof! Well where were we?"
Adnan: "You were about to tell us about Pakistan..."
"Yes yes, Pakistan is a great country. Freedom, literal freedom.. If it weren't for the factors like load shedding, corrupt politicians, inflation etc. We'd have a great country at our hands... Speaking of hands, Excuse me..."
Zohair goes back into the wash-room, and after an hour long wait, Adnan leaves..


Adnan had to catch Ahsan Ali Vahidy on a Barbados Cruise to get a few lines out of him. Adnan approached Ahsan on the deck, who was dressed in a tropical shirt and khaki shorts.. He was accompanied by his trophy wife, Shaista Wahidy.
When Adnan introduced the questions to Ahsan, his answers were pretty straight forward.. "Pakistan, hmmmm. Apart from the sense of freedom and ownership, the country advertises indiscipline.. The whole order needs a spanking, right from the top to the bottom.."


Adnan: "What do you have to say about Saudi Arabia?"


"Saudi Arabia, the comfort and the quietness, the place feels like HOME, but as for entertainment, chasing unknown girls in malls is not my idea of an outing.."
Ahsan looks up at the sky, passes a naughty smile to Shaista and winks at Adnan. "This is what defines an outing"


Adnan: "Hello Shaista Baby"
Ahsan throws Adnan off the ship, into the water.


Adnan hasn't returned yet..